Dear1 Dear2

I dunno if many of you have encountered this before but… imagine this situation. You’ve just boarded a relatively crowded bus during rush hour (be it morning or evening). There are only 2 seats left on the bus, both sharing with a stranger beside. Now, there are some differences. The stranger next to the left seat is a beautiful young lady, slim, neatly dressed and lawfully occupying only her own half of the twin seat. The stranger next to the right seat is a grumpy old man, messy hair, overly tanned, stained clothes and has one leg occupying half the empty seat. Now if you are a girl, which seat will you choose? And if you are a boy?

I think the answer is straightforward. It doesn’t matter which gender the observer is, he/she will most definitely choose the seat next to the girl. Why? Here are some reasons.

• There is a full seat next to the girl but only half a seat next to the guy.
• Even if the guy’s leg isn’t stretching over the empty seat, girls are still generally of a smaller build than guys, so there will be more ’space’ if you choose to sit next to the girl.
• It will make the whole bus ride more pleasant knowing there are ‘nice’ people/things around you. The environment *does* affect one’s mood.
• At least you know girls normally dun emit odours.

As a result, pleasant looking girls will always find themselves having to share the bus seat with someone because they are simply too difficult to resist. Guys on the other hand will find themselves hogging both seats to themselves, especially if they are big sized, like to spread their legs over the empty seat, radiates odours/sweat, looks untidy. But of course, a handsome looking guy or a cute boy boy will probably suffer the same fate as the pretty girl; similarly, a seriously overweight girl that occupies one and a half seat or fierce looking lady will find themselves having both of the bus seats.

You realize that all I’m talking about here is exterior looks. Or rather, the image that you portray to others on a daily basis. First impression does count and very often you only have 2 seconds to make a first impression, with or without trying. Not judging a book by its cover is very difficult to achieve in practice. A pleasant looking person, guy or girl, really does have an advantage when dealing with people or events, so it becomes really important to look good everyday. Of course, once you have been attracted by the good image of the person, you would want to pry deeper to know his/her personality. If the pleasant girl you chose to sit next to on the bus suddenly fishes out her handphone and start blasting music like nobody’s business on the bus, then it is likely you would start regretting your decision to sit there.

You are now sitting on a bus. The person boarding the bus is an opportunity, an opportunity seeking a door to enter. You and the empty seat beside is a door. Everyone else has their own door. But who’s door is the most attractive? Who’s door makes the greatest impact in that 2 seconds? The opportunity will walk towards that door. Then and only then, that the host has a chance to demonstrate that he is not only all looks, but also full of substance.

-Dear1

Dear1 and Dear2 attended one of Dear2’s colleague 21st birthday party the other day. 21st birthday have always been an important event in young Singaporeans’ lives. So for Dear1 and Dear2, we also celebrated our 21st birthdays 5 years ago – together. Since our birthdays fall on the same month, we chose a date that falls on a convenient weekend that month so that we can invites lots of guests to our party. At East Coast Park, we invited Dear1’s groups of friends, and Dear2’s groups of friends. The party was a BBQ event, purely BBQ, no catered food. And Dear1 and Dear2’s mums each prepared some homecook bee hoon and curry and finger foods and not to forget, the 21st birthday cake. I still remember the large birthday cake is in the shape of a key and it costs $60. What an old fashioned cake, haha. In total, we invite around 40 guests, and we were in command of the preparations ourselves (other family members serve as helpers).

5 years later today, as we attend other people’s parties, the fun seems different – is it the crowd, the food, or simply the games that we don’t play nowadays? The party itself seemed ceremonial, with everyone taking turns posing with the birthday girl and the birthday cake before the cake cutting and birthday song(s) singing. And after the cake cutting, everyone seemed eager to go home, oh bother. If such is the case, how is the elusive 21st birthday any different from every other birthdays?

- Dear1 and Dear2

ps: Haha, this post is jointly written together by Dear1 and Dear2, with each person writing alternate sentences (excluding this ps paragraph). No prizes for guessing correctly who wrote which sentence.  Do you wanna make a guess?

ps2: See previous attempt here.

Omg. It has been weeks since Dear2 wrote that Dear2 is back blogging, but there has been no posts since then.

Life is hectic. Or rather, Dear2 has been feeling hectic for the longest time around. Never-ending work to do, forever piling laundry to wash, endless keeping of the house neat (and clean – dust just keep piling up despite windows closed), not enough time to spend with Dear1….. It seems that Dear2 is feeling the strain of life. Time not enough. But, if you ask Dear2 what she has been spending her time on, she is unable to exactly list them down.

Time management. Are we spending too much time on insignificant stuff, and hence neglecting the important ones? It seems to be so, if you do not know how your time is spent.

The 7 Habits tells us that we spend our time doing 4 kinds of things.

1. Urgent but not important.

2. Urgent and important.

3. Not urgent and not important.

4. Not urgent but important.

Obviously we ought to spend time on the important things. Reflect upon yourself if you do not know why important things should come first. But very often, we tend to focus on the urgent things. Forever tending to urgent things make you become a ‘firefighter’. Do you want to be one?

Prioritization. This is the act of listing down the list of things or tasks to accomplish and planning and scheduling them. Have you done it already?

-Dear2