One plus one equals two; one plus one does not equals one.
When a girl and a guy gets together as a couple, in name, they are one, a pair of couple. But whether being in a relationship or not does not diminise the characteristics of the two individuals. The girl is still herself and the guy is still himself.
Having been together with Dear1 since 17, Dear1 and Dear2 have gone through various phases of our lives, whether as a couple or as individuals. As a couple, we’ve weathered the extremely 甜蜜 phase of 初恋 to the ocasional bickers of 小摩擦 to the irritable constant 大摩擦 (as part of growing up as well) to the final 风平浪静 of getting used to each other, and then finally registering our marriage to embark on a life together. As an individual, apart from the inevitable puberty to adulthood, there are army life, university life, exams life, career life etc. Dear2 always feel fortunate to have Dear1 with me to go through these stages with me.
Probably the ROM somehow made Dear2 think that as a legalised couple, we have become One. Yesterday’s excursion with our family members led Dear2 to be very unhappy with the way Dear1 handled the situations. As a daughther and son for 25 years in our own homes respectively, there are definitely different customs and culture in the 2 house which someone not part of the family will not appreciate. That is the biggest reason why Dear1 and Dear2 strongly wants to have some 二人世界 in a place we can call our own after our ROM, cos getting to know about a person’s 25 years of habits is not an easy task, much lest having to get to know 3 other people’s. Anyway, after the ROM as a One couple, Dear2 starts to have expectations of Dear1.
Alas, as Dear2 reflects on the yester day’s unpleasant trip, it also dawned upon me that that Dear1 and Dear2 are still two people. We are who we are beacuse we ARE who we are; Dear2 needs to see Dear1 as who he is and Dear1 needs to see Dear2 as who she is. Sounds profound, but mule through this carefully. It is appreciating the person as who he/ she is really is, and not who you want him/ her to be. One of our female MP got hitched recently to a gentleman who is much older than she is, and the thing that attracts both of them is that, the other person can see the best and bring out the best in the other party. The best encouragement that a couple can give each other, is to appreciate each other for who they are, and than bring out the best in each other.